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How to Handle Privilege with Grace
“Privilege” is a word that gets thrown around a lot in our culture. Part buzzword, part weapon, it’s been fired at people in so many different contexts that its meaning has become inextricably fused with morality, entitlement, and character.
In general, I see people react to the charge of “privilege” in two ways:
- They Deny It.
This was the case with a certain white male of my acquaintance. In a discussion on sexism with my insanely brilliant astrophysicist sister, who has had to overcome massive and subtle prejudice to earn her position at Yale, the man said, “I don’t believe in sexism or racism. I mean, I’ve never seen it or felt it.”
While on the surface this sounds like an absolutely absurd thing for a white male to say, it’s true that the mechanisms of sexism and racism (and the other isms) are so subversive that they really are difficult to explain to people who haven’t felt their sting.
I’ve seen so many conversations go something like, “what do you mean, racism? C’mon. We no longer have separate water fountains or schools (at least, they’re not labeled as separate), and we had a black president for god’s sake!”
“No but you see, the insidious workings of the system…”